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my weekly rants

south korea and its provinces

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Being the perfectionist that I am, I cannot abide by writing inaccurate, or should I say unconventional, addresses on Amazon and other such sites. It simply bugs the hell out of me (a whole new meaning to it *gasp*).

So this OCD of mine has finally built up enough to deluge and wipeout whatever inner peace I had artificially constructed upon myself, and I am now left with the utter havoc left in the wake of Noah’s flood.

If it’s too long and you didn’t read it (or tl;dr), I say it’s time for some little research into knowing what to write in which section of your typical address sign-up page.

South Koreaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa here we coooooooooooooooommeee.

Let’s start out big. Korea, or the Korean Peninsula, is split into two distinct countries: North Korea and South Korea. Of the two, South Korea is the richer one. In South Korea, we have EIGHT huge ass provinces, except for Jeju Island because it’s in the South and everything in the South wants to secede.

Since Korea is one helluva special place with all its kimchi and whatnot, it’s got a little thing going on with adding special suffixes. A province ends with “do” (e.g. Gyeonggi-do = the province of Gyeonggi) and is itself split into cities (“si”) and the even smaller counties (“gun”).

But don’t start thinking that Seoul is part of Gyeonggi-do just because Gyeonggi is a province. Nuh-uh. “Do” is one of the primary divisions of South Korea; the other two are teukbyeolsi (특별시) and gwangyeoksi (광역시). Teukbyeolsi and gwangyeoksi are just cities treated on the same level as provinces: “teukbyeol” means “special” and “si” means “city”. They’re also known as metropolitan cities (Seoul being the exception). Looking at the illustration up there, you can see that there are EIGHT self-governed cities with provincial status.

Application.

Seoul would be treated as a province because it’s the one and only “special city” or “teukbyeolsi” (romanization is “Seoul Teukbyeolsi”). Busan, the largest port city and second largest metropolis (after Seoul) in Korea, is officially called “Busan Metropolitan City” and you should know by now that it’s a gwangyeoksi.

Re-application.

So it's not wrong to have both the City and State/Province/Region sections be the exact same.

Starting to make sense?

Again.

If you still don’t get it, whichever one applies for you.

I don't think I've ever visited Jeollanam-do.

And here I chose a random-ass city.

Note that I put the “si” and “do” to help denote that the former—Suncheon—is in fact a damn city. But in all seriousness, do write it down. It’ll at least get rid of the potential frustration/confusion that might arise within those faceless peeps who are working for the betterment of humanity.

And to top it off. Bromance? We’ll never know.

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Written by hyunwook12

November 14, 2010 at 11:23 AM

vacations and harpoons

with one comment

A vacation is not really a vacation for me: It’s a time of solitude.

You can’t really go out and play in the claustrophobic, 21st century industrial landscape of Seoul. The moment you walk outside, every sort of noise blasts itself onto your unprepared ears. (That’s why, young lads, you need something called protection! Ow ow. Okay, I’m sorry.) That includes honks, rumbles, vrooms, screeks, the occasional chirps, and the not-too-rare cricks.

There are, however, fragments of mother nature strewn about Seoul. If it weren’t for those occasional trees that flank the sidewalks, the suffocating air would be even harder to tolerate. But, like all things, you get used to it. I don’t know how long my lungs will last though.

Moving on.

Let’s (“let’s” = “let us” astonished me) talk about something more lighthearted. Have you heard of harpoons? Neither have I. Crash course. Commence.

The

harpoons

man

them.

Still haven't manned them yet?

Well, this is what you get.

I love internet memes. And Wikipedia for defining it below.

“The term Internet meme (pronounced /ˈmiːm/, rhyming with “cream”) is used to describe a concept that spreads swiftly via the Internet. The term is a reference to the concept of memes, although this concept refers to a much broader category of cultural information.”

And to top it off, pbfcomics.com. Oh, how I cannot live without thy humour (*smack*). Get a room Romeo. And stop being such a wuss.

Let's see. Smart, check. Funny, check. Butt-ugly, check.

Written by hyunwook12

September 22, 2010 at 12:05 AM

awesome, sick, sounds

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Guess I’m sick.

Sick? Oh my gosh. Man, how’s the temperature?

It’s all cool. I could do a few glasses of cool water though.

Alright, dude. Here, drink some of this cool water I’ve brought for you.

Thanks, bro.  I wouldn’t be able to drink this cool water without you.

No problem. We cool?

Yeah, we cool.

He be so cool, even Ben wants a taste of him!

Have you wondered why, in Usher’s OMG, it’s oh my gosh instead of oh my god? To possibly not offend those believers of God?

Maybe. (If you’re such an ardent follower of whatever religion, you should’ve noticed by now how I didn’t capitalize the g in god.)

Have you also wondered why, in the illustration above, a black child is innocently walking behind Benjamin Franklin? To uphold this image of racial equality?

Maybe. (Wait, isn’t that an Asian kid in the background as well? Maybe.)

So I’m sick, and it’s break. I really think there is some universal trend, some underlying law of the cosmos, that clearly states a correlation between the proximity to vacation and the likeliness of catching a cold.

What are the odds? Ow.

Now that we’ve gone through both the awesome and sick categories, let’s talk about sounds.

Oh, yes. TRON: Legacy. That in an awesome sci-fi setting, through sick 3D glasses, and with intense Daft Punk bass? There, gentlemen, is the ultimate recipe for awesome. I can’t wait to go to the theaters and just get eye raped by all the visuals. Wow, talk about the pinnacle of theatrical adaptation. Just gives me the shivers.

Enjoy.

Written by hyunwook12

September 20, 2010 at 12:14 PM

i’m not dead, yet

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Thanks to a friend of mine who indirectly influenced me to restart this rusting, creaking blog.

I hope I don’t have to lubricate it anytime soon.

Anyways. I started this blog as a project for my English class. (Ah ha! You see how I capitalized “English”?) So, following the course of our beloved logos, you can say that I quickly lost interest after the project was graded and stowed away into my report card (dun dun dun). Also, I had written this blog for people whom I knew living overseas. Now that they’re back here in Korea, my will was further deterred.

But because the average reader doesn’t really give a crap, let’s cut to the chase, shall we?

I kinda feel bad about abandoning this blog. It took me at least a good ten minutes to decide on the number of O’s for my blog’s name (17 to be exact), and I like getting visitors from all over the world.

We all aspire to succeed in something. When I signed up for WordPress thinking how inconvenient it was to leave Blogger, I had a dream. Make it into something big. And long.

Now, my English teacher won’t be looking at this from now on (but just in case, hi Mr. Stephens!), so the content can be hopefully more “interesting” (rated Z for Zombo.com).

Don’t really have much else to say. And I’m not making promises. Because promises suck.

A good lesson for all of you out there to never get a puppy. Wait wha-.

Talking of which. I love pbfcomics.com. I think we share a similar taste in humor. I think we do.

I’ve saved a dozen or so into my funny pictures folder, which I’ll sharing with viewers like you. Thank you.

And before I go, when I implied figuratively that I wanted to make my blog big and long, I was insinuating at the length of my blog’s name.

Or not.

Written by hyunwook12

September 6, 2010 at 10:40 PM

Posted in deep, funny, life

Tagged with , , , , , ,

percentages and leakages

with 2 comments

Categorization is finished! Yes (without, however, the help of the people, by the people, for the people)!

I was about to start this blog with an “Ever wonder why…”, but I decided not to because it felt too mundane or humdrum or banal.

English sentence patterns, anyone? Just a heads up. I’m trying to use a wider variety of sentence patterns to make my blog posts more interesting to read. So, here is yet another grammar lesson!

General statement (idea) : specific statement (example).

Both are independent clauses. Here’s an example.

  • I ate a banana: It was delicious.

Yeah, to my surprise, I think the capitalization in the specific statement is necessary.

Let’s begin by talking about cellphones. With all this craze about iPhones and smart phones and intelligent phones and sentient phones and whatnot, I wonder when society as a whole will move on, just like we did when we got the first telegram. (Transatlantic chess matches have never been better.) I, myself, am part of this craze as well, but, of course, to a much lesser degree. It’s just that it’s quite fun to flick your fingers across the screen and see your music list dart up and down like an overhyped puppy or, for that matter, an adorable Scottish Fold.

And let’s continue on with massages.

Tell me about perfection. Wow. That deserves a hundred and five percent.

Talking about percentages, it’s an interesting concept, especially when they’re used for grades. Let’s say, for instance, that Mark’s English grade is currently an A-; he has a 91.5.

Ninety-one point five out of hundred, right? But what does that mean? He has a near hundred percent in English, but what does that tell about Mark? That he may be interested in learning the hidden themes of Brave New World that even Huxley, himself, had no intention in putting it in? (Woah, I said that Lenina can be a metaphor for the 21st century’s overly flirtatious woman? Awesome.)

No, I believe the use of percentage as a means to show a student’s academic performance has gone astray. We sometimes say things without having second thoughts about it. For instance, “I’m thirsty” in Korean literally translates to “My neck is dry.” (Now give meh lotion to moisturize mah dra epidermis.) Same thing with percentages.

Mark: Hey, what’d you get for that project?

Jacob: Man, I totally bombed that one; I got a B+. (FYI, this is KOREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.)

M: Seriously? My grade dropped down to a 92.4; I’m so pissed off right now.

Notice how the number of A’s in the word “KOREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA” is 17, equivalent to the number of O’s in the title of my blog. But aside from that, this 92.4 has taken on an entirely new meaning. It’s the tug of war between an A- and an A, where a single harmless-looking minus could later on force colleges to reject you for that son of a gun who didn’t have that minus in his college résumé.

What we need is a list of adjectives describing our performance:

  • In-fudging-credible
  • Very good
  • Meh (Don’t ask me if this is an adjective.)
  • Poor (Yeah, I somehow happen to know about your family’s financial crisis.)
  • Unacceptable

I really don’t like how the conventional list goes something along the lines of this:

  • Excellent
  • Very good
  • Good
  • Okay
  • Poor

What always bugged me was that “Okay” was fourth in line. Wait wha-. From what I’ve heard since I was conceived upon this earth (kinda sucks how we have to wait here on good ol’ earth till we get our ticket to heaven or hell), okay was the middle guy. Okay was the kind of dude who was not too much of a dork but, unfortunately, didn’t manage to suck up enough of those Alpha genes from his mediocre family tree, with its most exciting event to fame probably being that single tree which Jesus couldn’t hold and took a leak on. (Fasting for a month without ever taking a leak? Or at least that’s what I heard. Heh.) Being God’s son and all, he probably would’ve foreseen the dangers of holding one’s piss for too long.

Check this out on how to professionally hold your pee pee when there’s no bathroom nearby.

Woah, I just realized that the word “phone” has a really weird spelling. P-h-o-n-e. Weird.

Written by hyunwook12

May 14, 2010 at 10:18 PM

batter-ay and play

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New post! It’s almost as if I’d gone on an ill-fated trip and come back barely alive (with just my baby toe missing).

Now, I’ve collected a lot of material for my blog, and I have to say, “When in the cornflaking world am I ever going to finish this post that should be sent to the milky depths of my leftover cereal bowl?”

Without further ado, I shall begin. But, I’ve got a request for those looking at my blog: Help me find a suitable categorization method! It’s driving me nuts. Yes, these little obnoxious aircraft nuts are kamikaze-ing themselves into my esophagus (cough cough cough HACK).

First of all, I found this cool little app called coconutBattery that allows you to see the age of your Mac and the change in the capacity of your battery. Sorry, Windows users. Oh, don’t be sad, I ensure you that I am an avid fan of Windows as well.

Moving on, I recently saw the Brighton Beach Memoirs done by the theater people at my school, and I had to admit, it was actually good. Although I was initially skeptical (hmpf, yet another boring play, I presume) of the quality of the play, and the fact that it was two hours long didn’t help my enthusiasm. My friends and teachers, however, ensured me that the play was fun and definitely worth watching. I gave in and went, and my, it was pretty entertaining.

But what made this experience more notable than others was that it was the first time I realized what the essence of a play was. Because I already knew half the actors, I thought that the play was going to be somehow less meaningful. I thought it’d be just another enactment where my friends read the lines of this nonexistent character and be this nonexistent character. Well, it wasn’t, and as I kept on watching the play, I began to see my friends as the characters whom they represented. Basically, it was the only good play I saw from a school production, or it may have been that I just wasn’t paying enough attention in all my past visits to the PAC.

Quick grammar lesson before I go. Ever wonder when to use e.g. and i.e.? Learn, my disciples.

Written by hyunwook12

May 9, 2010 at 10:41 PM

categorization and gluteus maximus

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Categorization is a pain in the gluteus maximus.

Written by hyunwook12

April 21, 2010 at 7:42 PM

Posted in informative

Tagged with ,